6
Secrets To Meet More Dates Online
by
Lisa Daily
By now you know that online
dating is by far the most popular and easiest
way to meet someone fabulous. And even if you
work the swing shift, only date junk food addicts
or are looking for someone who shares your adoration
of Desperate Housewives and Sex Inspectors, it's
easier than ever to find your perfect match. Not
having as much luck as you'd like? Lucky for you,
upping your odds of finding your dream date online
is as easy as microwaving a bag of popcorn - just
follow these 6 simple tips:
1) Post a photo,
even if you think you look like Quasimoto
The first thing you should know is that profiles
with photos get eight times the response. Why?
Nobody, but nobody, wants to end up with whatever
is lurking behind door number three. Here's an
interesting little factoid from Steven D. Levitt
and Stephen J. Dubner, authors of Freakonomics
(William Morrow, 2005): "A low-income, poorly-educated,
unhappily employed, not-very-attractive slightly
overweight and balding man who posts his photo
stands a better chance at gleaning some emails
than a man who says he makes $200,000 a year and
is deadly handsome but doesn't post a photo."
The lesson? Post a photo - even if it's a quickie
that you intend to take down later and replace
with something else. Don't wait until you lose
twenty pounds. Don't wait until the Rogaine kicks!
in. Post your photo today - even if it's not perfect,
it's sure a lot better than nothing.
2) The absolute
best thing you can say on your profile
While it's important not to lie, it's also important
to know what's working for you:
According to Freakonomics,
The biggest advantages a man can have? High income.
The biggest advantages a woman can have? Beauty.
And blonde hair.
And while good looks are important to both sexes,
beauty is most certainly in the eye of the beholder.
Don't worry about trying to be something you're
not. It's most important to feel good about who
you are -- everybody looks great to somebody.
3) The Color Most
Likely To Snag You A Date
It's red. When we see red, our hearts beat a little
faster and we get a sensation that mimics attraction.
So, if you want to crank up the attention-getting
level with your online photo, it's a good idea
to either use a red background for your main photo,
or wear something red. Remember, red makes everybody
hot. It works in person too, so be sure to wear
at least a little red on your first "in-person"
date.
4) Email, Texting
and IMs, Oh my!
First, you want to keep in mind that the purpose
of emailing a potential date is flirting. Keep
the conversation fairly light, just like you would
on a first date. It's usually best to avoid hot-button
subjects like politics, abortion and gun control
until after you know each other a bit better.
Also, it's never a good idea to use an email relationship
as a cheap alternative to therapy. Don't complain
about your parade of exes and how the opposite
sex is out to get you. (If you feel that way,
you need to take a little dating sabbatical and
get some real therapy before you wade back in
to the dating pool) It's also a good idea to keep
your email contact balanced - try to match them
one-for-one. In other words, don't send four emails
to his one. You'll come off as being a bit overzealous.
5) When to cut your
losses
Most people email for about three weeks before
initiating a personal meeting. If it's been more
than two months and you haven't met yet, odds
are you never will. (And there's usually a good
reason for that: maybe your online sweetie is
married, confined to his rec room wearing one
of those prison-issue ankle bracelets, or is,
hmm, otherwise unavailable.) Unless you're just
looking for a pen pal, you might want to chalk
this one up to experience and move on.
6) Stage A Safe
Meeting
Never (EVER! ) give your personal information
out to a stranger. And, even though you might
feel like you know someone pretty well based on
an email or telephone relationship, it's important
to remember that you don't really know them. Which
means you should take precautions.
First, always meet in a public place. Next, be
sure to tell a friend where you're going and who'll
you be with. Always be sure drive yourself home.
Last, take your cell phone and keep it with you
at all times.
Have fun and follow these six simple tips - your
inbox will be jammed in no time flat.
© 2005 by Lisa
Daily. All rights reserved.
Lisa Daily is the author of
Stop Getting Dumped!
All you need to know to make men fall madly in
love
with you and marry "The One" in 3 years
or less. At bookstores everywhere. As seen in
Cosmopolitan, The Washington Post and HITCH: On
the Set
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