Dating is big business! Think about it: So many single men and women out there looking for a soulmate.  That's a huge captive audience.  All an enterprising business has to do is to come up with a method to bring these single people together in a common arena.

And there are businesses out there that do just that!  And, I've been the poster child (consumer) for most of these businesses.  Let's chat about a few of these enterprises.  I'll start with my least favourite:

Speed Dating  A speed dating event is like a cocktail party (usually in a slick bar or an upscale lounge) where you meet 20 - 25 single guys or girls in your preferred age group. You spend between 3 to 5 minutes chatting with each of your dates - just enough time to figure out who you’d like to see again. On a sheet that is given to you by the organizers, you tick the names of all the people that you'd like to meet again.  You hand in the sheet back to the organizers at the end of the evening.  The following day you are sent the contact details of the people on your sheet that liked you too, you take it from there.

Sounds simple, n'est pas?  Well, I've tried this twice and each time I found the experience less than satisfactory. 

The reason I never warmed to the idea of speed dating is that I have no control over the persons I am about to meet.  The only common denominator that brings us to the venue is often the age or geography.  It's a bit of a gamble, if you ask me, to expect that you might find one or two candidates interesting enough to see/date again.   Also, I agree that 3-5 minutes is generally enough time to decide whether you want to see someone again but when you've figured out in 30 seconds that the guy across from you is a total loser - the balance of that five minutes can be excruciatingly long and interminable.

It's also a bit tiring to repeat the same stuff over and over again to each new date because, not surprisingly, they all end up asking the same sort of questions: so what do you do? where do you live? have you done this before? and, here's the most annoying question of them all, what do you do for fun?

Imagine having to answer those questions twenty times in one evening...often to someone that you have no interest or desire to ever see again.  Some events actually supply you with a list of ice-breaker questions.  Most of them are ridiculous.  I've often used the questions themselves as an ice breaker: Can you believe these questions?  One suggested question was, how long ago was your last serious relationship?  Whoa!  That's not exactly a first date kinda question.  And I'd never be comfortable asking or answering that to someone I will likely only know a maximum of five minutes!

That said, speed dating definitely has its merits: it is extremely time efficient, as it allows you to meet between twelve and twenty new people in a matter of a few hours.  The time assigned - three to five minutes per date - is ideal: it is absolutely possible to rule someone out completely as a potential match. Five minutes is sufficient to hit it off with someone, with a view to either platonic or romantic involvement, and in this case, the time tends to fly by.

I would definitely recommend trying this at least once.  The only caveat I would add is not to pin too much hope to it.  Just go there to have a good time and if anything comes of it then that is merely a bonus.

A few tips to make this an enjoyable experience:

1.  Take a friend.  It can be very daunting to show up at a speed dating event all by yourself.  So take a friend along. A guy or a girl, either works well. That way you'll have someone to talk to when you go in and knowing at least one person there will make you relaxed.

2. Pick tables away from each other.  Although you're friends, you should still allow your friend sufficient privacy to speak with each date without having to worry if you're eavesdropping on her conversations (not that you ever would, right?)

3. Have some good questions thought out in advance.  If you do meet someone you like, ask something that gives the person a chance to say something they haven't already been saying for the last twenty minutes.  It does not have to be about Eintein's theory of relativity. Ask something on a subject that you enjoy talking about.  Travel plans, most recent film they saw, etc.   I've actually had some pretty good conversations with some people I met at the Speed Dating events I attended (even though we both established within the first minute that we were'nt likely a good dating match).

4.  Have fun! Now that you're already there you may as well make the best of it.  So if you are confronted with a series of undesirable candidates, do not adopt a sullen expression or roll your eyes.  That's just rude.  Be polite, be considerate. Even if you don't find a date, you might make a useful contact and possibly make a new friend.

I know friends that have met some great people at speed dating events.  It's not really my thing but hey, it might just be the ticket for you ;)

Here's some companies that offer speed dating events in Toronto:

www.milati.com (geared towards south asians) They host events for specific religous groups such as Hindus, Muslims, Sikhs etc. Some events end with an afterparty

http://www.25dates.com

http://www.fastlife.ca/

http://www.singleinthecity.ca/

Be sure to share your speed dating stories with us.  I'd love to hear about your experiences.